:: thoughts from the heart, blotted by the hand ::


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Saturday, January 21, 2006
Falling in love has always been the scariest thing that happens to me. I once failed in love and I should've taken that as a sign that I am not for those fantasies.

Betrayal is such a strong word, feeling it is much stronger. It pierces right through your heart, crushing every vein. Tears have been blinding my eyes for hours now, I am losing hope. His lame excuses echoes in my ears, they stay there to let the hurting remain. I'm losing words, all I could type about are nasty thoughts on this thing they call love.

Sure, it is a great thing if you know how to handle situations that seem unbearable (or if you are one in a million of those girls who bagged the good guys). Majority agree with me, boys really suck on love. They feed on pride, they live on the good life. That is all they care about.

Men seems to have the key to your heart's ventricles- the one responsible for emotions, I guess. They easily access it, they easily get in it and they easily stop its beating. It's the 8th wonder, I must say.

I am not foolish, my pastor taught me that God says that people who take you for granted should be let go. There is a better path for you, soon that undeserving man would run to you in that same path but you won't look back anymore. Moving on is always forward. I don't think there is enough room for him to prove his worth. I've given him chances too many. If only I knew every single thing that wronged me in any circumstance. Well there is no way of knowing, I'm leaving it to God, him and THEM. Heartaches could be blessings, too. I would rather be blessed with a good college education than be blinded in a scam relationship. Everything was a fake. He was better than any actor I know. He made me believe, he made me hope, he even made me build dreams with him. I can be independent- building hopes and dreams on my own. No one shall depend her happiness to someone else for she should hold it in her own hands. So when he leaves, she would never have to cut off his hands because joy was never with him to begin with. I was right when I said that all the good things that landed on my lap for the past days has a price to pay. I paid CHEAP. I LOVE LIFE :) God saved me from falling debris on coming days.

-Tinay 10:15 PM links to this post |

~*~I have my feet buried beneath sand, I have my mind burned with desire and I have my heart blistered with your broken promises~*~

* Dwelling in Ortigas * Seventeen has been the peak of my whole life * I love hanging out with my friends- as long as I am with them, I am content. * I'm in search of the thing that I am really good at. I've tried ballet, gymnastics, piano, cheerleading, etc. Just not my thing. * Currently into fencing, though. * I'm a proud Christian who declares her faith * A part of my heart belongs to Rob Sy * I study in DLSU-Manila * I'm a BS Psychology major * I have mood swing tendencies * I can be sociable * I can also be unsociable to people I dislike * Generally, I can get along with anyone * Just do not bitch around me * I'm usually playing pool at Katipunan, Tomas, Metrowalk, Makati or Timog area * or I would probably be spotted seated at a resto bar or a coffee shop * I enjoy going to the movies * I am kind of tired of the night life * I'd rather be burnt with stress than be buried in boredom * I listen to house music most of the time * I enjoy traveling * Especially trips to the beach * I'm a frustrated writer * Being a cardiologist is my ultimate dream * School sucks especially when I dislike the teacher + subject * I can be a jealous person at times * There are times when I suffer from extreme paranoia * You may hate me for some things but I assure you that I am not a hypocrite * I'm suffering in a major college crisis * Help anyone? * I'll update this soon *

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